Bummer...

Yesterday night I checked our water cistern and we were almost out. I jumped in the ‘81 to haul some water, and about a mile from the house BAM I hit a wild burro. It ran out in front of me and even with hydroboost brakes there was no stopping the truck in time. This is a major issue where I live, although it’s usually cattle not wild donkeys. I’ve had a couple close calls already. I am heart broken for the poor animal. I hit it pretty hard but when I backed up to look for it, it was long gone.

The truck is looking pretty sad. I originally intended to refurbish it after getting the crew cab to a certain level, but I almost need a body donor at this point... or else part this truck out.





Most of it is cosmetic, although I do need to do something about headlight alignment and the passenger door won’t open. My current plan is essentially NOTHING. I need it to haul water and build a house which it can still do...

For the future I am conflicted. I am not a big fan of zombie apocalypse bumpers, brush guards, bull bars and the like, but I guess I am going to have to get one. I love the front end on these trucks and don’t like anything covering it up. Livestock  in the road is a fact of life around here. There isn’t a whole lot you can do except stay home or maybe drive around in 1st gear.

Anybody have any suggestions on what type of bumper or guard to look for? In addition to being ugly, most I have seen are just flimsy chrome tubes that hardly support their own weight let alone stop anything from hitting the truck. I am guessing I will have to fabricate something myself, but if anyone has any design inspirations that would be helpful. I need a cow catcher!

Jonathan,
That'll buff right out!!!    

I'm really sorry to see the damage, and I'm sorry for the animal too.

I nailed a good sized whitetail buck leaving my brothers house (in the rain) on Thanksgiving a few years back.
I had NO damage to my truck, but the deer had broken two legs.
It was excruciating waiting for him to show up and finish it. (Not carrying, because I considered I might have a toast)

I might jest about Mad Max here.
Certainly the  'Roo bars' found on everything from lorries to ute's down there deserve consideration.

https://live.staticflickr.com/129/361268715_517a19fe51.jpg

Maybe a tough winch bumper with a push bar and overbuilt brush deflector would be more fitting?
Not 'overbuilt' massive, but thicker walled -stronger- (know you said you don't want to go there.....)

Or a push bumper from a tow truck?!?! (Effective, and not too low)






The whole 'catcher' thing has me though.
On rails or paved roads you don't have to consider approach angles or digging in.
You DO.

A pre-runner type skid might reduce front end damage but wouldn't have prevented the cab damage.
Rock sliders, nerf bars or side steps are the 'stylish' solution.
In descending order of obtrusiveness...




Around the Northeast we have little use for them and they're mostly seen on mallcrawlers and brodozers, but no one would accuse you of that.

Anyway, first thoughts that come to mind.
Subscribed and looking to see how this plays out.

Again sorry to see this latest challenge.  

Sorry to hear about the bang up Jonathan, that sucks for sure. I too feel bad for the animal...I hit a weasel the other day and felt bad enough about that little guy.

People often hit deer around here, but I never have. Porcupines are REALLY common too, and they're like hitting a cinder block in the road, but I haven't hit one of those guys in a long long time.

Hard to tell from the picture, but is that passenger side rocker panel still straight and undamaged? If yes, that's good news at least.

I'm not much help on the bumper discussion, but I'd take an Arizona truck full of dents over one of the ones full of rust holes up here.

^^^^ x2!

Porkies are bad. 😞

I lost a good friend and ex-roommate Steve (Navy BUDD, tough as nails) when he hit a 60 pounder and rolled down an embankment in Maine 30 years ago.

Here's what was on Darth when I bought him in 1994, unfortunately (a) I don't know who made it and (b) it is long gone. It actually didn't look too bad.

Sorry, Jonathan.

I'd start by loosening the 3 rear fender bolts (2 under the hood & 1 under the body) and the core support body mount nut, then backing away from an anchor with a chain/cable/strap hooked to the fender as close to the impact as possible.  When you get it a little farther forward than necessary to open the door, tighten everything back down.

I started my bumper with 2 ~16" pieces of 8" hot-rolled C-channel outside the frame horns, then welded a longer piece across the front of them to make a bumper beam with enough room behind it for a winch.  Then I boxed the ends to make storage compartments that mimicked the angle of the original bumper ends, with 1/4" plate fronts & bottoms, and lighter tops & backs.  Last, I built a fold-down grill guard from 1/4" plate & ~1.5" Sch.40 pipe that was strong enough to push trees down, or pile cargo on.  It was VERY strong, but still light enough for me to R&I alone, and high enough not to interfere with off-roading.  There were no modifications to the truck to fit it - the original bumper could have been reinstalled at any time.

Thank you gentlemen! Steve, that is quite an impressive bumper. I appreciate the links and ideas. Jim and Corey, I had no idea porcupines were so bad to hit. I’ve seen them in the mountains but didn’t realize they weighed that much and were that solid. Never picked one up and hefted it I guess 😅. I was afraid I was going to have to call the Sherriff to deal with the burro, but evidently it wasn’t hurt that bad. It was GONE.

My hood appears to be okay. The core support wing is bent in a bit, I think, but may be salvageable. I need both front fenders and a door. The cab rocker panel is fine, but it does need corners from rust. Right bed side is ruined. And I concur. I would rather deal with this than rust cancer.

I know I said my immediate plan is “nothing”... but I did find this ad (about an hour drive from me). It’s been posted for a month so the fenders, hood, and doors are already sold. But he does still have the grille/core support (good price) and the wrecker push bumper. It’s not that pretty, but it is affordable and probably effective. I’m going to try to make time tomorrow to go check it out.

Ford F834 wrote

Jim and Corey, I had no idea porcupines were so bad to hit. I’ve seen them in the mountains but didn’t realize they weighed that much and were that solid. Never picked one up and hefted it I guess.

Where I live I don't think they'd be any bigger than 15-20 lbs, but I haven't hand my hands on one either. The main issue with them is that they're slow, like a sloth...lol. I see them on the roads ALL the time...and they get hit a lot here. Mostly them, raccoons, and deer for us, and something I've seen a couple times recently is dead beavers on the road.

Over in Newfoundland they have a real problem with moose on the roads. I've seen them cross the road in front of me, but I've never hit one. They're like hitting a horse. Where's Vinny?...I'm sure he has some stories.

I took this pic below on a bike trip back in 2011.



In any case Jon, glad you're OK and that the truck is still mobile even if it is dented up. Hopefully you can find some cost effective AZ parts to slap on there.

Sorry you were late to getting those parts.
I'm sure more will turn up, and it not as if the accident has you off the road.

The bumper looks a little shorter than the one I saw, but maybe they are the solution to wandering livestock.  ?

Jonathan - That is a huge bummer!  So sorry. 😩

I have an ‘81 radiator support. Was 351M, but should work fine. Ford said to stuff tire tread in to reduce the size for a smaller radiator. I’ll trade it to you for the later one you brought me. 😉

It's a shame you're so far away, I have a straight passenger side door that just has a few rust issues on the inner lower side. It's probably gonna go in the scrap pile here soon.

Deer are a big problem here in Florida, cattle are only a problem when I'm working with them in the field.

You know Jonathan, I was just over at "that other Ford truck forum" and looking at the stickied threads on the '80-'86 section.

There, I found, this...: https://www.ford-trucks.com/forums/1528073-grille-and-brush-guards-available-for-our-trucks.html

Ford F834 wrote

...wrecker push bumper. It’s not that pretty, but it is affordable and probably effective.

Pay close attention to how it's attached to the frame, and post pics of what you see.

You might offer him $2-300 for everything that's left.  Leave your truck bed at home, ratchet-strap that cab onto your frame facing backward, and haul it all home with its front bumper as your tailgate.  Bailing-wire your taillights to your bumper for the drive.

Thanks guys, I think I remember seeing Ken/SCFlareside’s thread now. Those designs seem good for protecting the the truck from a square hit, but don’t look strong enough for a corner clip like I had. Granted I did swerve which is not really advised, but I think it saved the donkey and probably traded sheet metal damage to the side of the truck instead of crumpling the front and pushing the radiator into the fan. I would not swerve like that at highway speeds. I was only going around 35mph to begin with.

Gary, thank you for the offer on the core support. I will keep it in mind as I peel the layers and assess the damage. I’m just grateful everything is still more or less functional. I loosened the fender bolts and did some gentle prying so the door opens now.

I don’t know that I will even focus on protecting this truck unless/until it has a new front clip, but I definitely want to have something heavy duty in front of the crew cab. Maybe it is futile trying to plan for hitting a 2,000+ lb bull, but I need to do the best I can. Last year our main access road alone had 8 cow collisions in two weeks, and many other roads in the area were similar. There were even some on US Hwy 68 because of cut fences. One of these resulted in fatalities. You just can’t see a black cow in the road at night. Flagstaff has high numbers of elk collisions. Elk are big and do a lot of damage. They are easier to see than black cows, but harder to stop for at interstate speeds. I can only imagine hitting a moose. When my aunt visited Canada she said there were road signs in series that read: Watch for moose... moose are BIG... you DON’T want to hit one! You might need a grille guard as tall as the cab.

Edit: Steve, I would like the cab but that’s a pretty cumbersome item. I think I’d rent a little U-Haul trailer before I pulled my bed. That’s a lot of work in itself. I will see what it’s like. Honestly I shouldn’t be messing with any of it... but I don’t see push bumpers often, especially for a Bullnose. I am curious how it is fastened also. If it’s not made right or can’t be fastened securely I’ll pass.

Elk and Moose are tall enough that you take their legs out and the body comes right through the windshield.

That + being 500-700 kilos is a recipe for disaster, even in a pickup.
Imagine it in most cars, which are low slung and have much less acreage of sheet metal for a hood.

You can probably watch the old MythBusters moose-collision special on YouTube.

Here's the bumper on Chanute, my 80 1 ton. It was an oil rig out in Kansas.

I was watching for those wild burros last Thursday. Drove from Lake Havasu City to Phoenix for a Diamondbacks game.

This is not what you are looking for, Jonathan, but I saw it and thought of you:

https://www.ironbullbumpers.com/products/1980-1986-ford-f-150-front-base-bumper